A Mother's Perspective on Sorority Recruitment
I remember sitting nervously on the steps next to a long-time NCL mom friend as we waited for the Panhellenic mini-meeting to begin. As a complete non-Greek rookie mom, I knew I had to absorb every detail and get it all down right. My NCL pal sitting next to me seemed so relaxed as we chatted and caught up with other Moms after the holidays. Of course, she was calm; she had been in a sorority and was completely fluent in the jargon and all things Greek. The phrase "It's all Greek to me" now made perfect sense because it was. Ugh!!
As the meeting went on, the more I learned, the more anxious I felt. Usually, information is super helpful to me, but the more I listened, the more questions popped into my mind. While driving home from the meeting, I wondered why it felt so big and important to get it "right." I pulled into the driveway and saw my daughter's car with the college decal sitting there, and it hit me. I realized that this was the final challenge I would help her with, and then she would be all on her own at school. I wanted her to feel successful, find her people, and start college on a positive. It wasn't about the bid-day pics, date parties, the beautiful houses, or philanthropy work. It was kindergarten drop-off all over again. The only thing I wanted was for her to find a circle of friends for this next chapter.
Coming to that realization was both freeing and terrifying. I now understood why it felt so important and meaningful to me. If we nailed the prep and got it just right, would she end up in a top house, surrounded by amazing girls, and have an incredible college experience? Or if we didn’t get it right, would she fail miserably and be doomed to loneliness for all her years? Allowing myself to imagine each extreme gave me perspective and clarity; honestly, it even made me laugh. The reality was it would be somewhere in the middle because there is no such thing as a perfect rush! There would be highs and lows, and I would be there for each. There is no right or wrong way, just Jenna's way. My job as a mom was to support and prepare her in every way I could while respecting that this was her rush experience.
As a mental health therapist, you would think this would all be second nature to me. But senior year is a busy and exhilarating time, and emotions can run high clouding our thinking. In the moment, I didn’t immediately recognize that the unknown was triggering anxious feelings in me, which led to my black-and-white thinking and a desire to control the outcome. These feelings stemmed from a very natural maternal instinct to protect, but they could have strained our relationship if left unchecked. Information and preparation are the antidotes for anxious feelings because they empower us to face the unknown and rise to the challenge. This is why we created Gracefully Greek and partnered with Sorority Prep to protect and nurture mental health and the mother-daughter relationship.
To gain insights on how to support your daughter through this journey, come join us for a complimentary mom support information session. We will discuss research findings and provide tools to help manage stress, as well as evaluate your daughter's mental preparedness for rush.
Together, we can ensure that your daughter has the best possible experience, while also taking care of your mama heart. We look forward to seeing you there and embarking on this journey together!